Please Take Me Away from Earth

I was chatting with an anon on my Tumblr, and wound up writing a song, sung by all six Masters.  Here it is in its entirety:

anonymous asked:

Please take me away from earth. School is shit and the people there are shit. And America is shit.

1: I don’t think it’s quite that bad; upon thinking about it, what you need to do is to get involved, and get creative while you’re at it.  Musical cue, please…

For you see, every world has problems.
This one’s full of unpleasant people,
But Skonnos is full of large hams,
And Trenzalore can’t have any liars near its steeple.

Yes, every world has problems,
But what you need to understand is,
Every problem has solutions;
You needn’t run away in a TARDIS.

Rexel’s people revel in bloodshed,
And Gallifrey’s in boredom;
Skaro’s will seek your head,
But still there is a way to freedom.

So your world is unpleasant,
But what you need to do
Is figure out what is pleasant,
and those pleasantries pursue.

2: On Terserus I was fried,
And lost without a doubt.
For my future I was terrified,
And I saw no way out.

But did I let that stop me?
No!  I looked for a solution,
And when Goth came from Gallifrey,
I saw my way to revolution.

Yes, a revolution is what you need,
To make your life more pleasant,
To save your world from its greed,
Attack what you resent.

You needn’t fight with gun and blade,
That’s not the Master way.
If my sooth makes you afraid,
Just hear what I have to say.

3: You have a gift with words, my friend,
And that’s where you’ll see escape.
To prevent your life’s end,
What you need is a plot to ape.

What makes you glad?
Write it down.
Marvelous adventures, worlds gone mad,
Anything if ‘twill cease your frown.

Don’t say you have no ideas,
For look at what’s done by others;
Steal their plots, not entire,
But one piece from one and another from another.

No, this isn’t plagiarised;
For it’s how things are done;
All fiction is piecemeal from far and wide.
So steal well and that’s how you’ve won.

4: But how is this revolution?
How will it change the world?
Even to I you must listen,
For thus your hatreds are foiled.

Look at Khan - a hero, true?
Yet mountains of skulls were his realm.
This is the power of the word,
That is what steers the helm.

Save the republic, like Cicero,
With words of sooth and truth,
No need to call yourself a hero,
With violent ways uncouth.

Oh, write fiction, as you please,
So did those two grim brothers;
And thus we have but one Germany,
And not a host of bothers.

5: As Mr. Swift, speak of your horrors;
Declaim your views from every roof,
And demand attention from others.
They’ll have to see the truth.

But I’m too young!  You cry,
Still in school, not yet bred;
Well, so was I,
When I first fought and led.

The youth are the future,
That’s what you’re always told;
So seize the day, be the future,
And to your virtues hold.

Fight now, write now,
For the battle is not yet lost;
But wait ‘til you are out,
And your failure will be vast.

6: Look at me!  I’m Prime Minister!
Sorry, I’m still excited;
But you need to consider the future,
And try to be incited.

Don’t just moan,
“This isn’t right!”
Don’t just groan,
You must fight!

Forge your destiny,
Of iron and quill,
This is yet the land of the free,
So freely use your will.

I hope you listen to our advice,
For it has served us well;
Well, mostly, with one or two a vice,
But it is worthy still.

Received and understood, Anon?